Tube with ageing rockers at the helm

Apparently Mike Read the Smashy / Nicey DJ, former Top of the Pops presenter and all round Cliff Richard impersonator has made an unofficial shortlist of Tory candidates standing as Mayor for next year's elections. Infamous nightclub owner Peter Stringfellow is also thinking about it.

Neither have been particularly forthcoming about their transport policy. Mike Read said that bendy buses are a "crazy" idea as they clog up roads and that the congestion charge is "unfair" on people who forget to pay. Stringfellow isn't as developed as Read with his thoughts yet and only said "I feel so strongly that Livingstone has to be stopped from destroying London with his mad schemes that I have been giving a lot of thought about running".

In the unlikely event of either of them becoming Mayor I wonder what this would mean for the Tube.

Of the two I'd be more in favour of Read, as I hope that he'd be leniant on people who "forget" to pay for a ticket on the Tube. He might also think that tourists are a crazy idea as they clog up the wrong side of escalators. I imagine he'd probably kick Johnny Vaughan out of the Covent Garden lift voiceover gig and take on all the announcements himself.

Then again if Stringfellow came on board, he'd find it hard to stop himself putting poles to good use in non peak periods. Instead of buskers I'm sure we'd see more raunchy entertainment a la the subway pole dancer in Milan.

Any other celebrities who you'd like to see stand against Ken? What do you think they could offer to the London Underground?